The Imperfect Me

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" Who are you to judge the life I live? I know I'm not perfect - and I don't live to be. But before you start pointing fingers, make sure YOUR hands are clean" Bob Marley

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Goh Cai Xia, Fiona. Twenteen. Graduated from Ngee Ann Polytechnic. Ian's.

Monday, November 24, 2008

9:32 AM

ITS TIME TO MOVE ON..
And it was made possible because of you.
Love you
Thanks for waiting 7 yrs..
Just wait for me..
After i heal, I'll give you my all..
Just for you "daddy".
<3

Labels: Thanks "daddy"

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

9:15 AM

Its the end of it all..FUcked up..But still, Happy Birthday..
I miss you..

Labels: It seems so easy yet so difficult

Sunday, October 19, 2008

8:14 AM

Sometimes good things fall apart so better things fall together.

I just need to know that this sentence is true. I just need to know that its possible that two people can stay happy together forever.

Friday, September 12, 2008

8:45 AM

Show me what Love is..If it means sacrifice, I'll do just that.. If it means controlling myself of all the bad habits and rotten behaviour and ill manners and lousy way of communication, I'll do just that.. But how come, I always end up asking myself about the things I do. Do people even bother to think of what they do after they do it? Or they take for granted that the other person will do the reflection and come to a conclusion that they will be the one to say they are in the wrong and they're sorry. What luck.. I have to be the one to give in.. But this is my life.. I always give in.. And if I choose to give in and feel bad about it, I am in the wrong. I noe.. But i cant be perfect all the time.. I dont want to find the need in placing the blame to anyone but myself. Maybe in life, people's reaction comes frm my action. No matter how right i seem to be, there would be a wrong. If people are blind to see their mistakes and point their fingers so easily, dont let me be like them. Lord give me strength..

Review

I'll look back, and ask God to show me the areas of sin and weakness.

Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting (Psalm 139:23-24).

Lord, hear my prayer.

Labels: Lord hear my prayer

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

8:58 AM

Its so difficult to be perfect for you. I can try.. But I will still be who I am in the end sometimes. Its ok if you dont accept me the way i am. I'll change.

But even if i accept you for who you are, you gotta at least pretend you try to change.

At least it makes ppl feel better.

Even if you refuse to try, at least understand how I feel.

Its difficult to always pretend everything is going to be ok.

Its difficult to pray to Him and thank Him for giving me that someone special when I am not even sure myself.

Its difficult to be that perfect person and try to smile over it.

Its difficult to understand why everyone i love treats me like this.

Anyway, its been a long time since its how i feel about something.

They never understands.

To Jesslyn:

Its great to know that at least when i needed someone,

it would be you I call.

There may be other people. But i still prefer you. At least i know no matter how rotten i talk, you'll still listen and encourage.

Thank you

You say i was so lucky

Money (cause i've got that little more than you), pretty (cause i am juz better to see than you), lucky (I wish) etc..

But i wonder, how come a girl like me, who never had to worry about not being able to get a bf, is not able to make someone i love come after me to comfort me when i walk away or feel sad?

And you say i was lucky to be pretty and rich and better off than you.

When someone poorer, or uglier, or fatter, or unlucky is able to make their love ones do all the things i wish someone would do for me.

And you say i was lucky to be pretty and rich and better off than you.

When someone poorer, or uglier, or fatter, or unlucky is able to make their beloved be so devoted and sincere to them and accept them for who they are.

And you say i was lucky to be pretty and rich and better off than you.

When someone poorer, or uglier, or fatter, or unlucky can find someone who would do all sorts of thing to make them feel so blessed, loved, happy till they take it for granted and their beloved never complains cause they feel they were born to do those things for them.

What kind of a luck do i get when all i needed was comfort and its just so difficult to even recieve those, pushing aside the fact that i wanted to be accepted for who i am.

I dont get it.

I dont.

Its just so difficult. I'm trying. I feel like i am losing it already. I am afraid i may not be able to keep up. And then i will give up. I am gripping on dearly.

Labels: Its so difficult and I dont get it

Saturday, September 06, 2008

11:50 PM

Its been so long since I last Blog..Dammit!!

Lets see

Hmms

Lemme show you my Uni's Logo.

The cheapskate version

Tada!

We were given this during orientation noe!

The badgey thingy..

In GOLD k!

Okies..Its Just that little coolious.

Labels: University at Buffalo

Saturday, August 09, 2008

11:46 PM

4 days without Laogong
My heart so painful
Cause i Miss Hubby so much.
*
1st day, I must Thank,
Bi Ling for accompanying me starting frm the airport!
And then, Yvonne and Jasmine for coming over to meet me for a mahjong Session and dinner!
Thank you for killing the time for me on this 1st terrible day!
*
2nd Day, I must Thank,
Mummy for bringing me to cut my hair and stuff!
Daddy for spending alot of $$ for my shopping at taka!
And daddy again for making my day by giving me a Visa Signature UOB credit card!
*Smiles BIG*
*
But somehow,
I still miss Laogong very much no matter what..
Laogong, I will always be remembering you.
I will always love you too!
:)
Come back soon!

XOXOXO

Labels: XOXOXO